Hines Ward To Be Hunted, Killed

Football players are a riot. Bart Scott, especially. Turns out that last year, after Baltimore lost by 31 to Pittsburgh, the Ravens linebacker made a little crack about Steelers wide receiver Hines Ward.

Until now, Ward hadn't gotten wind of it. But it seems, after a year, the comments finally made their way to the Steel City.

When asked about it earlier this week, the Steelers' wide receiver laughed and said, "Yeah, he threatened to kill me after the game."

Hilarious.

Meanwhile, Scott has lawyered up.

"What are you talking about?" Scott said Thursday when asked if he still held a grudge against Ward. "I don't have a rivalry with anybody. Just trying to get
ready for a football game."

Good move. Tell them nothing.

Rams Meltdown Continues Unabated

Rams running back Steven Jackson isn't happy with the team's 0-3 record. He's not happy with his performance so far. And he's really not happy with the decision to bench his boy Marc Bulger in favor of Trent Green.

And when Jackson isn't happy, no one puts him in the corner. Jackson popped off about the quarterback switch on his show radio show, "Rolling the Dice":

Jackon said benching Bulger was the "wrong decision." "He's our general," said Jackson, who then pointed out that you don't pay someone "$60-something
million" and then sit him on the bench. (Bulger was signed to a $65 million contract extension prior to the 2007 season.)

Jackson wondered aloud about what will happen when it's time for Bulger to return to the starting lineup. Jackson intimated strongly that Bulger would be unwilling to do so. Team sources did in fact tell the Post-Dispatch on Thursday that Bulger no longer wants to play for coach Scott Linehan. Bulger has declined comment for three
consecutive days since his benching became public knowledge.

When asked by the radio show's host, Malcolm Briggs, if there were other Rams players who were against the benching, Jackson paused and replied, "I'm not the
only one who feels this way."

Probably nothing to worry about. Scott Linehan has it under control.

It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia: Now With 100 Percent More Jon Runyan

If you don't watch It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia on FX, you should. It's, at turns, offensive, childish, absurd, stupid, offensive, outrageous, ridiculous and offensive. Did we mention it's offensive? Right. But it's always funny.

Which is why last night's cameo took us a little by surprise. Halfway through the evening's first episode -- "America's Next Top Paddy's Billboard Model Contest" -- a rather large construction worker has a run-in with Greenman. Turns out that construction worker was Eagles offensive lineman Jon Runyan.

The last time he was on TV was for a show called Full Contact. It was a behind-the-scenes look at Eagles training camp that only aired in Philly -- a decidedly less entertaining version of HBO's Hard Knocks. Runyan spent his camera time talking about taking naps.

Anyway, you can watch his turn on It's Always Sunny here.

Beavers Pound Trojans

USC thought it could just snatch victory from the Beavers. Wrong. Oregon State lies down for no man -- though it apparently wouldn't mind lying down with ESPN vixen Erin Andrews.

There were a number of signs in the Corvallis crowd scribbled specifically for the buxom blond. And at least one of them was prominently featured in the postgame celebration.



The Play in California explains:

Even a good old field storming is not immune from the entity known as EA.
What’s funnier is that the sign is the only thing that stands out in the whole
photo. You just see a big wave of orange and the We Heart Erin Andrews Sign.

Then I went to ESPN to get the story from them. Though it’s partially cut
off, it’s pretty obvious this sign is the same one from the above photo. Two
major websites, one sign, millions of fans who got the hots for Ms. Andrews. Oh
what a small world it is.

Meanwhile, ESPN thinks it's going to be hard for USC to get its edge back and reach the national championship.

Who Wants To See The Phanatic's Exploding Hot Dog?

Given that the Phillies are still trying to make the playoffs, it makes perfect sense then that terrorists would target Citizen's Bank Park. All terrorists are Mets fans. This is well known.

So when a tinfoil package was found outside the park the other night, wrapped in duct tape, the bomb squad was called in to handle the situation.

Hours before the Phillies-Braves game on Wednesday night, a film crew shot a commercial of the mascot shooting heavily wrapped hot dogs from a launcher.

But someone inadvertently left three of the duct-taped hot dogs outside
the ballpark, sparking security fears. Stadium employees were evacuated, and
the bomb squad was called in. Only after the packages were blown up did
authorities realize they had just exploded some sausages.

Can't be too careful about these things.

Vince Young Might Suit Up Sunday. Shoelaces And Sharp Objects To Be Removed From Titans Sideline

It appears the Titans might finally be able to coax Vince Young out of the coaches box – the perch from which he watched last week’s game – and onto the sideline. Tennessee plays the Vikings on Sunday, and head coach Jeff Fisher wouldn’t mind seeing Young scramble his way down to the field.

If Young is up to it. You can’t rush these things.

''If he is able to play we'll put him in uniform, that's the question that we have to answer before game time,'' Fisher said. ''We're going to make the decision based on how he's feeling."

While the Titans attempt to lure Young back to the sideline -- possibly with yummy snacks or Pacman’s leftover strippers -- ESPN has busied itself trying to figure out what’s eating the once promising quarterback. The World Wide Leader may have found part of the problem.

On Day 3 of the Vince Young saga, a 78-year-old man showed up on Young's
doorstep with a suitcase, unannounced. The Spirit sent him.

Pastor Samuel Smith does not question these messages; he just goes where
they take him. He is Young's spiritual adviser. In the early days of 2006, after
Young led Texas to the national championship, the pastor had a dream in which he
saw men trying to catch a rainbow trout and make it their trophy. "Man," he
said, "that trout is not meant to be on nobody's mantelpiece. Let him go
free and let him do alone what he can do."

Smith used that dream to advise Young to leave Texas after his junior year
and become an NFL quarterback. And now, 2½ years later, football followers
wonder whether Young was truly ready.

And they wonder whether Vince Young is OK.